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One of the benefits of MOPS membership is a monthly MOM E-mail. It is a little article written by a regular MOPS mom who shares a tip and some quick mom advice from their own experiences. I always glean a little from reading these and I find it helpful to know I am not alone in my mission as a mom. I have posted September's MOM E-mail as an example for you to see what this benefit looks like.

Preschool Regrets

by Alexandra Kuykendall, mom of four

I sat in the classroom on what felt like a doll-sized chair, my knees up to my ears with the heavy three-ring binder on my lap. I didn’t have to open it to know it was full of school policies (read: expectations for parents to give in many ways) and class rosters. It was preschool orientation. What am I doing here? I asked myself. I quickly counted six years of preschool mothering under my belt. Like I need to be taught how to have a child in preschool.

And this was not just for any preschool. This was our neighborhood cooperative preschool. Despite the three minute drive from our house and the perfect Tuesday/Thursday afternoon class schedule, I was beginning to regret my decision to return to this school where the expectations felt like a second job.
 

"Helping in the classroom 
had sounded quite manageable 
months ago."

The classroom helping requirement felt daunting. Once a month I would have to figure out somewhere to send the baby so I could help in my 3-year old’s classroom. Helping in the classroom had sounded quite manageable months ago. What’s one afternoon a month? I’d thought. But I also knew from experience come November with sick siblings home from school and Christmas errands, I’d be resenting the classroom requirement. Why did I sign up for this?

But as well as I knew the scrambling involved to make classroom aiding work, I also knew how happy I was each time I helped. Sitting with my knees up to my ears I remembered as each month rolled around with my previous preschoolers how glad I’d been that I’d made time to see my child outside of our familiar home environment. I looked around the room at the easel, the play kitchen area, the reading corner with its bean bag chairs and display of “back to school” themed books and imagined my newest preschooler exploring it all for the first time. The regrets melted away as I readied myself to join her as she took one preschool-sized step into the big world.

 
Lord, help me to be present in the mothering duties I avoid. Help me to see them as opportunities to grow along with my child.

Alexandra Kuykendall is a writer and editor for MOPS International and regularly blogs at www.mom-ology.org/blog



Intergenerational Strategy by Margot Starbuck, mom of three

Before I had kids, I had all sorts of big ideas about how I’d strap them to my back and we’d hop on my scooter and serve the world’s marginalized peoples. Once I had kids, I could barely find time to slip out of my nightshirt, let alone leave the house. Those in rural Africa and America’s inner cities were just going to have to do without me for … the next eighteen years or so.

And while I’m not making any transatlantic voyages for a while, I did start to notice folks who were marginalized in my own community. In fact, I could see Miss Betty’s living room from my front porch. Because her family lived at a distance, Miss Betty was hungry to see children. As God opened my eyes, I started to notice all sorts of ways to serve right under my own nose.

-Elderly Miss Virginia, on a route I often power-walked, sat outside everyday both due to a lack of air-conditioning and also to have some human contact.
-A senior center opened up downtown near the school my oldest attended.
-Everyday, at noontime, aging Mr. and Mrs. Dunham traveled fifteen miles to visit their daughter, with multiple disabilities, who was institutionalized. 

It became clear pretty quickly that there was a whole population of “hidden ones,” marginalized especially by age and ability, who would welcome human affection. Here are some age-appropriate ideas for intergenerational relationships:

1. Take advantage of your first child’s early infancy, before separation anxiety sets in, visit care facilities where older adults can hold your child.
2. Give your 6-12 month old “floor time,” with favorite toys and mobile at the home of an elderly neighbor while you chat.
3. If a neighbor spends time on a front porch, give your preschooler a bottle of bubbles and let her play in the yard.

With a little holy imagination, you’ll find plenty of opportunities to move with Jesus toward the ones he loves.
  
 
Lord, as I mother, I long to engage with the world you love. Show me the places where my child might dispel loneliness right in my neighborhood.

Margot Starbuck is a writer and speaker who lives in North Carolina. You can connect with her at MargotStarbuck.com. 
Her book, Small Things with Great Love: Adventures in Loving Your Neighbor, explores more of these simple ways to touch your community.


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